Tori Amos - Professional Widow

Song Review

Lyrics - Live Performance Video

There are two versions of this song. The Armand Van Helden remix was a huge hit, and was a major contributor as to why I avoided Tori's music for so long. It's a shame, because it's perhaps the most divergent "unrepresentative hit song" of the decade.

The album version, on the other hand, opens with a chromatic riff (think "Bohemian Rhapsody", the middle section of Muse's "Butterflies and Hurricanes" or the overture to Phantom of the Opera), played on harpsichord. When I first heard it I was blown away by how unlike the remix it was, and how much I enjoyed it. Industrial drums, an inventive bassline and some weird background noises join before Tori begins singing. "she moans, breathes, screeches and sighs"[1], intoning "Don't blow those brains yet", becoming progressively more intense and desperate as the song goes on.

A delicate piano and vocal duet interrupts the flow and introduces a more overtly feminine aspect to the song, with Tori's clean, sweet singing contrasting the surrounding dirge. The harpischord riff returns, and the odd roaring background noises increase.

The chaotic coda, with Amos pining "Mother Mary, give me peace", introduces a panoramic guitar line, and the song finishes as abruptly as it begins.

The lyrics are oblique and cryptic, most likely dealing with "sex and religion"[2] (the former during the verses, the latter in the interlude and coda). The remix quotes a couple of lines and repeats them ad nauseum, creating a mischeivous but unsubtle double entendre. "Honey bring it close to my lips" and "it's gotta be big" work better in context, and at the proper, unmanipulated speed.

As you might guess, I'm not fond of the famous remix, although it got me interested in what the original might sound like, so in that respect it served its purpose quite well. If you're put off by the remix, try the album version of "Professional Widow", a rare song that can appeal to both fans of Tori Amos' brand of piano rock and those into dark, heavy and unusual music.